The Truth about Introverts

The idea for this blog came after a few changes in my own life have taken place. In the past I have been a total extrovert. I was extremely social, and several people would call me " the life of the party." And, as everyone does, I would have those occasional moments when I would want to be alone. But that wouldn't last long, and I would run with open arms back to the social spotlight. Recently I have had my entire social relm turned upside down, and it's made me change who I am. Either that, or I am just finally adapting to who I really am. An introvert.

Now when a lot of people hear the word "introvert", they visualize this super shy person, who is most likely cuddled up in a snuggie reading their favorite book like the nerd they are. And all alone. Not gonna lie; I thought this at one time in my life. But recently I've became super good friends with a fellow introvert and I've seen firsthand that that is actually totally the opposite of what we are. We have the capacity to be bubbly people with shining personalities, but we enjoy just being alone. And no. That doesn't make us lonely. Believe it or not, we LOVE to be alone.

Extroverted people thrive off of people's energy. They feed off of that. And get lonely when left alone for very long. Introverts are completely the opposite. There's only so much social interaction they can take before they back away, sometimes for long periods of time. They tend to thrive off of being left alone and re-charging by themselves. And there's many ways we recharge. Either by reading a good book for a while all alone, listening to music, working in the great outdoors, hiking, or simply being alone and meditating, etc.

I can say all this with complete confidence that I know what I'm talking about because I have been both personality types. And if you think that's not even possible, then well, I don't know what to say to you,  you skeptic person.

So in a nutshell, here's some words from a quote I found that nails the introvert feelings.

" Sometimes I sit in silenve. I can be distant or unfriendly. I have conversations in my head which dominate my day. And night. I keep my circle small. I find trusting someone new to be a hurdle I rarely climb. I like staying home. It's peaceful. And though you may think I'm dull, I assure you it's an explosion of colour inside my head. I am an introvert. "

And so I'm going to blow the myths about introverts right out of the water. Because we are actually fun people. Here we go!

Top 10 myths about introverts

(And for a disclaimer, these are not my own. These facts are out there I just studied to bring them to you so you don't have to work to find them.)

Myth 1.) Introverts don't like to talk.

This is NOT true. Introverts just don't talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won't shut up for days.

Myth 2.) Introverts are shy.

Shyness has nothing to do with being an introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don't interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an introvert, just start talking. Don't worry about being polite.

Myth 3.) Introverts are rude.

Introverts often don't see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth 4.) Introverts don't like people.

On the contrary, introverts intensly value the few friends they have. They can counts their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you're in.

Myth 5.) Introverts don't like to go out in public.

Nonsense. Introverts just don't like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don't need to be there for long to "get it." They're ready to go home, recharge, and proves it all. In face, recharging is absolutely crucial for introverts. (See it wasn't just my opinion.)

Myth 6.) Introverts always want to be alone.

Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get lonely if they don't have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth 7.) Introverts are weird.

Introverts are often indivdualists. They don't follow the crowd. They'd prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don't make decisions based on what is popular and trendy.

Myth 8.) Introverts are aloof nerds.

Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It's not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it's just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth 9.) Introverts don't know how to relax and have fun.

Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. (Although here I would have to personally disagree.) If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. (But this is most definitely true.)

Myth 10.) Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.

Introverts cannot "fix themselves" and deserve respect for ther natural temperament and contribution to the human race.

(Source:  Pinterest. Aka, where all good things come from.)

So next time you come into contact with someone who is maybe a little more quiet, just remember;  they have a crazy side too. And they are worth something. Sometimes worth more than the person who talks a lot.

Staycations

First of all, I am going to try to blog a lot more than I have in the past. And hopefully someone reads these so my time isn't in vain.

Back to the title! You may be asking yourself what exactly a staycation is. According to my Google sources, its technically defined as "a vacation spent in one's home country rather than abroad, or one spent at home and involving day trips to local attractions". So there. Now we all learned together what the proper definition of a staycation is. My definition is quite similar. I would say its basically like staying at home for vacation and finding fun things to do with your family at home.

Okay so before you exit the blog for thinking this idea sounds totally boring, let me tell you some ideas I have for a staycation. That's the purpose for this since summer 2016 is coming upon us quickly. Seeing as I took a flight to a warm spot this January, I doubt I will be making any more big trips this year. And because of that, I got to thinking what I could come up with to do that would be like a vacation at home. Hence the topic, staycations. Plus, the ideas are great if you are on a tight budget and can't afford a vacation this year. Alrighty lets get to it!

1.) If you are like me and love a good adventure out in nature, what could be more fun than camping in the great outdoors in your own backyard? Or if its cold out, and you want to do something fun, try camping in your living room! And don't lie to yourself and say that would be silly cuz' we all know we made blanket tents as kids. ( And I'll be the first one to admit I still do.) Even if you have a campsite in a town near where you live, rent a campsite for a night or two. It will feel like a get away without the expense.

2.) Go visit the closest zoo or museum or amusement park near you. Or combine the three in a few days for the feel of a real vacation. Recently, a friend and I went to the National AirForce museum which happens to be about an hour away from me. Like the nerds we are, we spent most of our day there, then went shopping at a VERY fancy outlet. Then drove home late in the evening. But the day felt like a small vacation. Find something within 1-3 hours away that you can easily do in a days drive. It will give you that feel of being just far enough away from home.

3.) If you have some places to hike nearby, take an entire day and go with a friend or family member and hike the day away. Don't forget to pack a picnic lunch to add to the fun!

4.) Spend a few days (or however long you have) with family. Nothing is as fulfilling or fun as spending time doing fun yet everyday things with the ones we love. It could be just a day of drinking coffee and playing games together, or working in the yard and laughing the day away.

5.) Plan a day just for you! This could be many things; giving yourself a manicure or pedicure, homemade facial or hair masks, or sitting down to your favorite TV show to binge watch the latest season you've been dying to see. Whatever you want to do on this day, make it special just for you. If you feel like being introverted (which is me about 80% of the time), then go on a bike ride or read your favorite book with a cup of tea.

These are just a few suggestions. See how many you can come up with on your own. I'm sure you will surprise yourself with what you can come up with. And whether you choose to do something alone or with family or friends, make sure its something that relaxes you, yet invigorates you. And makes you glad you saved that money and stayed home for vacation this year.

Good Times

As I live life, I have my good times, and my bad times. For some reason, I feel like my bad times outweigh the good. Partly because I've created the bad times for myself. But not always. Sometimes things just happen that I cannot control. Other times I choose to make life miserable for myself. 

For example; I recently just came thru a very dark period in my life. Friends were dropping left and right, and I became a work-a-holic because that's all I could do. Finally things came to a head and I broke down emotionally. I decided my pride wasn't worth my pain. And so I mended some fences, and had some much needed air-clearing conversations. And I learned one very important thing. Pride is not worth losing people. Sometimes, you gotta suck it up and do what you absolutely do not want to do. Because in the long run, you want life to be full of good things. Good things, good people, and good times.

Stress to Impress

You hear the term "dress to impress" a lot. But what about just trying to always impress either a group of people or just that one person that you want to maybe prove yourself to. (And I'm speaking to myself here too.)

My question is, why do we always feel the need to impress others? Why can't we just do what we want, say what we want, wear what we want, post what we want, without wandering what other people are thinking of us? 

I think we as humans are constantly fighting this battle against Human Comparing Syndrom (HCS). We always find the need to impress, or up ourselves in the sight of others. But why? What in our makeup makes us think we have to prove ourselves? 

I think instead of trying to answer that question, we all just need to work on accepting our own selves. Our quirky personalities, the way we all think differently, and use that to our advantage, instead of tearing ourselves down constantly wondering what others are thinking of us. 

Oh Canada

After spending over a week in Saskatchewan and Alberta, I have discovered just how much I love Canada. 

I got the chance to go to Banff National Park in Alberta. There I fulfilled my dream of seeing Moraine Lake and Lake Louise. It was so breathtaking. Actually, that doesn't even describe it. You would have to be there and see with your own eyes the glorious mountains and rivers and lakes to understand how amazingly gorgeous it is. What struck me as beautiful was the color of the rivers and lakes. Driving about you would occasionally see a river winding through the pine trees and it would be the prettiest shade of light teal, close to white. The lakes were each different shades of vibrant teals and blues. It didn't even appear to be real water at first sight. That's how crazy beautiful it was. 

Also, being the nerd I am, I absolutely loved all the pine trees. Adding to the  sides of the mountains and the valleys, they helped create the most magical place on planet earth. Or so I would say. 

There was a man in Canada who said he has traveled far and wide even in Europe, but believes Banff to be the most beautiful places of them all. And I don't doubt it for one moment. 

Chicago

Frank Sinatra once said (or sang) 

"My kind of town, Chicago is."

After returning home from a weekend in Chicago, it's hard to understand how anyone could not like that beautiful city. Maybe it's just because I'm a city person who loves simply strolling downtown passing hundreds of people and hearing taxis and buses honking at each other. Or riding the train and watching the transition from skyscrapers to houses and parks. 

Some people define themselves as country folk or a city person. I don't think I can solidly place myself in either category. I like living in the country; there's the sunsets, the peaceful rain storms, the star gazing at night, or just sitting on the patio listening to bullfrogs in the summer darkness. But then I absolutely love big cities. The hustle and bustle, the random people doing totally random things on street corners, the amazing architecture of the buildings, and the overall excitement it presents. 

•Moving On•

 Moving on. What kind of title is this? Moving on. Can one ever truly "move on?" Let me explain. 

I was reading a place in one of my notebooks where, after being severely disappointed, I had written down quotes about moving on from an emotional setback. And it got me thinking about how one really does move on. After writing 4 pages of quotes out, I was trying to convince myself on that day a year ago, that I could move on and triumph over the pain that was plaguing me. I did, eventually move on over the surface pain and anger. But the regret and hurt will never completely fade. 

Looking back farther in time, to 2 years ago, I glance at another trial that gave me much sorrow. I will not go into great detail, as that is not needed here. But, what I suffered then has stayed with me to this very day. To this very moment. I wish I could say I have moved on from that; but some things cannot be removed from your mind, nor from your heart. It was a pain so deep, so real, I could literally feel my heart breaking. You read about such sensations in novels and watch it in movies; but I felt that very thing. The kind of pain where you don't know how life could possibly go on after what has happened to you. The kind of pain where you begin to believe you can now longer trust anyone in your life because of your trust being broken. The kind of pain when your heart has been betrayed and used and left behind. When you wait until everyone around you is asleep so you can cry aloud. When every night your pillow is drenched with tears. And every morning you wake up with red, dry eyes. Unless you have ever experienced such emotional pain, you cannot possibly understand what it is truly like. So I ask you again. Can one truly move on from something so heartbreaking? And from something that temporarily ruined their life? 

My answer is that the answer is inconclusive.  Because it is possible to move on from how deeply you feel the pain, but the hurt never entirely goes away. Now, for some people, they are able to block it from their minds, and go on. But there are others, who simply just close their eyes and all the memories can flash before them, and they can feel the pain exactly as they felt it years before. 

Pain and hurt, however do not have to be the end of your story. There comes a time when you must decide to let go, and live on. Not move on, but live on. Letting the past be the past. I personally know what it is like to carry months and months of emotional grief every single day of my life and never move on from it. And let me tell you. That is the worst way you could ever live your life. When you never smile, when you never laugh, and when everyday is just a struggle from the time you rise in the morning until you sleep at night. And if you find yourself at this very point, I want to say one thing to you; don't let go of hope. Of life. Because tomorrow could possibly be the very day your dreams get rebuilt. And the very day that you begin to move on.